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As always thank you to  for the screencaps and a thanks to for the gif.

921abaddon2 Now little boy, I want you to scream real loud so daddy can hear.
921harper I may be Metatron's main boy but he's not really my father.
921abaddon1 Met-? No, I mean Crowley!
921harper Who?
921abaddon1 You know. The king of Hell!
921harper But I'm an angel.
921abaddon1 ... Let me make a call.
921gavin Who?
922sam1 Where is the doorway?
921gavin Uh... Behind you?
921gavin Go to church?
921sam2 Dean... I think he's...
921dean2 No! Don't say it.
921sam2 ...telling the truth!
921dean2 Well this is new for us, now what do we do?
  *phone rings*
921sam2 Hello?
921abaddon2 Hello, Winchesters. Are you looking for an angel?
921sam2 No thanks. We've got plenty.
921abaddon1 N - Look you idiots, I think we got our kidnappings mixed up.
922dean1 You kidnapped an overly devoted Renaissance fair attendee?
921abaddon1 No, I was trying to kidnap Crowley's son.
92sam3 How did you do that?
921abaddon1 Uh... the time travel spell that brought me here in the first place? Duh.
922sam1 But our granddad had to use the power of his soul and travel "blood to blood". How in the world could you reach Crowley's kid?
921abaddon1 Look if we spend all day arguing over minutia nobody's going to get any screentime.
922castiel Oh oh! I'll go!
921dean_sam Not now, Cas. Where we doing this?
921abaddon1 I hear Poughkeepsie is nice this time of year.
921dean2 Oh no, you do not get to invoke canon after breaking it.
921abaddon1 Fine, meet me in Cleveland.
921sam2 We'll be there. *hangs up*
922tessa Hey guys, what's going on?
922dean1 Tessa? Why are you here?
922tessa This is where angels hang out I thought.
921dean3 What? No! Wrong! Bad reaper! *stabbity stab* *runs off*
922tessa Is your brother alright?
922sam1 The Mark of Cain is kind of... making him sensitive to the 4th wall.
922tessa Well if he's going to be like that see if I ever reap him again.
921sam2 Hey, can you at least pretend to be dead so his feelings aren't hurt?
922tessa Fine. I'm dead. *blarg* and stuff
922metatron2 Pardon me, but I believe you have my angel.
921abaddon1 Who are you?
922metatron1 What? How can you not know? I'm Metatron, the big bad of this season.
921abaddon3 Excuse me? If anyone is the big bad this season it's me!
922metatron1 Please I'm God!
921abaddon1 And I'm an even bigger foe of the Winchesters!
922metatron1 ?
921abaddon2 I'm a still living female!
922metatron1 ... Well played. Still, I killed their little buddy.
921abaddon1 You killed Gilligan?
922metatron1 No I... it was Kevin!
921abaddon1 Who?
922metatron2 Ugh, look there's an easy way to solve this.
92sam3 Dean, are we in the right place?
921dean2 This was the address they...
  Scene: Metatron and Abaddon stand an equal distance away from the Winchesters
921dean2 What's going on?
922metatron2 We need you to determine who is the arc villain this season.
921abaddon3 Come on boys, you know you want to stab me...
922metatron1 I've totally been an asshole...
922dean1 Oh man. This is the hardest choice I've ever had to face!
921sam2 Dean, there are two of us. We could just kill them both.
921dean2 How? You got an extra first blade there on you?
921sam2 I have an angel blade--
922dean1 See? You're useless. I gotta do this alone.
921abaddon2 I killed your grandfather.
922metatron1 I killed Kevin.
921dean2 Hm. Damn this is hard. Why oh why must I bear this burden alone???
922sam1 =(
921abaddon3 I'm a female that's survived nearly a whole season!
922metatron1 I'm a short fellow that's done the same.
922dean1 They both make a persuasive case.
921abaddon1 I scratched up your car.
922metatron2 *shock* You did, WHAT?
921dean3 DIE BITCH! *stabbity stab*
921abaddon3 Hah! I knew... you hated me... more... blarg *is dead*
922metatron3 I can't believe it! You hated her more than me.
921dean2 Don't worry Metatron, I can stab you too.
922metatron3 Oh you say that now, but you'll be thinking of her! *vanish*
921crowley He is right. You are a bit of a tease about the whole killing thing.
922dean1 Your day is coming...
921crowley Words. Just sweet, empty, meaningless words. *yoink*
921sam2 Hey! I think Crowley just took his son from our back seat.
922dean1 And?
92sam3 He's been plucked from the past! If we don't send him back time could get all sorts of screwed up.
921dean2 Can I stab time?
922sam1 ... No.
922dean1 Then I don't care.
921gavin Those are your friends?
921crowley The closest I've got to any, unfortunately.
921gavin Are they always so... ornery?
921crowley My boy, when those two aren't mad, that's when you know the world is ending.
(crossposted @


# love2boys 2014-06-17 23:56
I really laughed out loud at least 3 times. I still like these. They make me homesick for Short Attention Span Theater.