Recap – Two and A Half Men

A Monster of the Week opening!  Honestly, I dug back far to the last time we saw one of these.  It depends on your criteria.  If you include monsters from the apocalypse, we go back to “The Devil You Know.”  If you want to go with monsters that have nothing to do with the apocalypse, thats…(digs back deep into season five)…”Sam, Interrupted.”  Wow.

It all opens like a typical MOTW story, the warm fire, the family pictures on the fireplace, the typical lulling us into a false sense of security.  Suddenly a picture is smashed by a bloody hand!  Scary score plays as the bloody mother holding a baby is running terrified through the house and up the stairs.  She goes into the bedroom, closes the door and tries to call for help.  The fast busy is pretty much your sign the line is down.  She slides under the bed and takes the baby with her.

Mom tries to silence the baby while the stranger goes by, and I’m thinking about all those horrible situations like in the finale of MASH where a mother has to smother her baby to keep the kid quiet.  Luckily, this show won’t go that far, plus when we find out the punchline later, turns out that wouldn’t have killed the baby.  Still, being a mom, any trauma that involves a baby freaks me out a bit. Speaking of freaking out, Dad is a bloodied mangled mess on the bed.  Mom sees this and it takes every fiber of her being not to scream, even though she’s clearly traumatized.

Mom checks the door again and there’s no sign of killer, so she’s kind of relieved.  That is until she looks at hubby again.  She has about one whole second to cry though, for the boogeyman reaches down, grabs her by the ankles and she goes sliding.  Focus on the baby unharmed under the bed while Mom screams during what is her gruesome end.

Shattered glass.  I guess it isn’t just the Winchesters who’s lives are falling apart.

Another tranquil home in suburbia, the sign “Home For Rent” with a “Rented” over top of it.  Oh Dean, did you actually move?  Are you like John Winchester or something?  I guess you don’t realize that moving around like that is actually bad for a family.  Dean is in the garage and pulls back the tarp on the Impala just enough where the trunk is visible (sniff, I miss Baby).  He pulls out his trademark sawed off shotgun and looks at it longingly.  I know, I feel the same way about my favorite gun.  If I had one.  The boy is definitely sad.  He realizes that what he’s doing is pointless and puts the gun back in the trunk, the keys in the toolbox, and covers back up his Baby.  Now I’m sad!  He grabs of box of kitchen items and goes inside.

Lisa is in the kitchen unpacking while Ben is at the kitchen table moping.  Lisa tries to be supportive, asking him to be open minded. “At least wait to check out the place before you hate it.”  I bet that John wasn’t like that with his boys when they moved.  I’m sure he was like “quit whining.”  Ben agrees and then decides he wants to take a bike ride around the neighborhood.  Dean sooo does not like that idea.  He uses the excuse that Ben should help his mother unpack the kitchen.  Lisa gets exactly what Dean’s doing but covers anyway.  She promises they’ll check out the neighborhood later and will go out for lunch.  Dean agrees with forced enthusiasm.  He’s lying!  Oh Dean, what sort of messed up situation have you created?

Speaking of messed up situations, Sam is doing the FBI thing alone (sniff!) at the house where the carnage took place in the teaser.  It’s an idyllic Victorian in Lansing, Michigan.  Anyone familiar with this part of the country knows that I-69 easily connects Lansing with Indianapolis, Indiana.  Or even Cicero if they’re still there.  So yes, Sam actually could get to Dean quickly in this scenario.  Especially considering how fast he’s been driving that Charger.

Sam asks questions to one of the detectives about the scene.  The parents were murdered upstairs, the baby is missing.  It’s not a break-in though for the alarm never went off.   Sam sees a picture of the baby and asks if he thinks “it” is alive.  It?  What’s up with you Sam?  It’s a real human being.  It’s a she.  I keep waiting for Dean or Bobby to show up and hit him with that two by four of common sense.  The detective is losing hope they’ll find the baby.  Sam actually acts sympathetic.  Wow, is that real Sam or are you playing your part?  Either way, it’s good to see you again.  Sam goes inside to take a look.

Next thing Dean is getting a pizza delivery.  He pays the boy and then turns around…to one sour looking Ben and Lisa.  I guess Dean just reneged on his promise to go out.  Dean pretends like he forgot.  Give it up Dean, they know better.

Sam leaves the house and he’s on the cell phone.  Except he’s talking to Samuel.  Major sad face!  🙁  I want him to be talking to Dean.  Sam reports there’s no sulfur, no EMF, they could just be dealing with a normal psycho here that kills parents and takes babies.  Samuel doesn’t think so, since its four babies in the same part of the state within days of each other.  Of course while he’s saying all this he’s pounding on a laptop in frustration.  Don’t feel bad Samuel, normal computer users do that too!

Samuel asks Sam to explain how any of that is natural.  Sam thinks it’s awful, but it may not be their thing.  I’m going to comment right now and throughout the episode how this is an AWESOME Sam hair episode.  Especially during the FBI things.  It’s not the usual hair.  It’s still got some organization to it, but it’s flying away on the sides giving it a sweet looking wave.  It’s so…so…sorry, loss of words there.  Too lost in the pretty.

Samuel doesn’t care about hair and goes on about the babies.  “Okay, either we’ve got monsters grabbing babies to make baby stew or we’ve got a bunch of psychotic yokels grabbing babies to make baby stew.  Either way, it’s baby stew.  Sam sighs, for he thinks Samuel is missing the point.  Hard-headed grandfathers are like that.  Samuel hears the sigh and doesn’t appreciate the tone.  “Am I boring you, you’ve got someplace you need to be.”  Sam insists he doesn’t, but I think its that little thing called a conscience tugging at him there.  Missing babies is a really gruesome thing, supernatural or not.  “Sometimes I wonder about you Sam,” Samuel says.  “Sometimes I wonder about me too,” Sam answers.

Okay, let’s take a paragraph here to speculate what all of that meant.  I took this to mean that Sam is actually feeling something here!  This whole case, it isn’t sitting right.  It seems to me that Sam has been on autopilot this whole time mindlessly following orders from his grandfather.  He hasn’t allowed any of those Sammy instincts to surface, going for the full, unfeeling tactical mindset.  You know, he’s turned into a Vulcan.  Maybe because his confidence is still really shaken by that whole opening the Lucifer cage thing.  Except his instincts are kicking in now!  Something is surfacing.  Coincidence maybe with seeing Dean again?  I guess we’ll see.

Samuel says he’ll check some things out, and that’s when Sam with the still smokin’ hair notices the security sign.  He tells Samuel the security company name.  “Yeah, sure, any chance I get to hop on a computer.”  That’s about the only thing that makes Samuel a normal grandpa!

Uh oh, next shot shows Ben in the Impala trunk playing with Dean’s prized sawed off.  Not good!  So Dean takes Ben’s interest with pride and shows him how to use each piece of the arsenal.  Psyche!!  No, he freaks out like a parent would.  A really uptight unreasonable parent.  He grabs the shotgun from Ben asking him what he thinks he’s doing.  Ben makes his plea of sanity, he just wanted to see it.  Dean puts away the gun and closes the Impala trunk, warning Ben never to open it.  Ben apologizes but doesn’t get it, Dean was handling rifles when he was his age.  Yes Ben, but Dean grew up in one fucked up situation.  Although, he did learn a valuable skill.

Then Dean says the one thing that has NEVER EVER worked in the entire history of the Winchesters, and probably the Campbells too.  “Mark my words.  You will never, ever shoot a gun.  Ever.”  Right, such orders always sat well with you and Sam.  Ben doesn’t back down.  He knows what’s going on, he knows something is coming for them.  Dean denies that.  “I can do what you do.  You can teach me how to shoot-” Ben says before he’s abruptly cut off by Dean’s yelling.  That scares Ben who apologizes and leaves.  Oh Dean, wise up!  This is exactly you talking to your own Dad at the same age.  You think this boy is going to listen?  Has anyone you even known listened to that kind of talk?  You just pushed that boy into hunting, except now he’ll do it without training.  Dean stands there all guilty, realizing what a dick he’s become.

Sam and his beautiful car are at a lakeside park.  Sam is reading files and what is this, eating a sandwich?  From a mini-mart?  I guess Hell will break you of salads.  Samuel calls him and tells him the security company is the link.  Sam listens with that nice fluffy hair (no, I won’t shut up about that).  There is a house that fits the profile that hasn’t been hit yet.  He gives Sam and address and Sam is off.  One thing of note, the baby is six months old.  It could be that this is a new writer Adam Glass is toying with us in the continuity department, or six months ends up being really significant in a folklore sense.  I go with the writer having fun with us.