Recap – “99 Problems”
Back to the arsenal of joy, aka the church basement, and the manipulation Sam just warned about continues! Leah comes in all teary. The angels are angry. They said they can’t go to paradise. Don’t worry people, it’s overrated anyway. This gets Jane in a tizzy since she’s fixed on seeing her dead son again. Leah says the angels gave clear commandments but some people aren’t listening. Sounds like another red shirt is about to get it.
Sam is back at the motel reading a book. He puts that in his bag, picks up another and as the shot moves back up, Castiel is there! He’s at the refrigerator. “I got your message.” I love these stealth entrances. Castiel goes on. “It’s long your message. I find the sound of your voice grating.” Sam knows something is wrong. “Are you”¦drunk?” “No,” Castiel answers while staggering forward. “Yes.” We get the patented Sam Winchester stare of disbelief. “What the Hell happened to you?” “I found a liquor store,” Cas answers. “And?” “And I drank it.” Ha! Best angel humor ever. Angsty angels are fun.
Castiel steps forward and stumbles a bit, so Sam catches him and asks if he’s okay. Castiel motions him closer. He whispers in Sam’s ear. “Don’t ask stupid questions.” Ha! It’s about time someone tells Sam that! He’s been asking that a lot lately when the answer is so obvious. Castiel moves onto what Sam wants. There have been tons of demons attacks in the town”¦Castiel cuts him off, asking if there’s been any sign of angels. Sort of, a prophet. Castiel wants to know who. Leah Gideon. Nope, not a prophet. Sam is pretty sure she is. Castiel is not only drunk, but quite grumpy. “The names of all the prophets, they’re seared into my brain. Leah Gideon is not one of them.” So what is she? More coming on that.
Dean is walking by Paul’s bar and hears a scuffle. Michael Shanks and Paul are fighting. I guess they’re trying to drive Paul out of town. You know, cause he’s immoral and all. Pastor Gideon is trying to referee. Paul tells Dean his friends are trying to run him out of town and he’s not taking this well. Michael Shanks claims it’s not their choice and he has to go for everyone’s sake. Paul points out the sad fact that they grew up together and that he stood up in his wedding. Jane, in full bitch mode now, says that was then and now he’s standing against the flock. This is a town of believers and he’s not one of them. Oh, just wait until you get your comeuppance bitch.
Paul won’t leave. They’ll have to drag him out. Michael Shanks goes to do that but Dean steps in. They don’t want to do that. He tries anyway so Dean punches him. During the mayhem a gun goes off and Paul sinks to the ground. Jane, that bitch, has shot him. That’s it, she’s banished from the red head club! “No one’s going to stop me from seeing my son again.” You better hope he’s in Hell lady, cause that’s the only way you’re seeing him. Dean and Pastor Gideon tend to Paul, but it’s too late. Um, shouldn’t this bitch be going to jail or something for this?
You know what, the 90210 ads are really irritating too. I’ve seen lately how that show can’t even crack 1.5 million viewers on original episodes. You think there’s a reason for that? Hmm? Now I want to see Damon Salvatore sink his vampire teeth into these white bred rich kids’ necks. All while a bloody Chuck Bass is running by screaming being chased by Sam and Dean. The tagline, CW Thursdays Kicks Everyone’s Ass!
Sorry…can’t…continue…recap…laughing…too…hard. Can’t…get…that…image…wiped…from…my…brain.
Ahem. Nah, one more time. Bwahhhhhhhh! Okay, its daylight. A stunned Dean enters the room. A worried Sam gets up saying that they went looking for him and he notices the blood on his hands. Dean tells the story. It’s not his blood. Paul is dead because Jane shot him. “It’s starting,” Castiel says sitting on the couch. Dean wants to know what’s starting and where the Hell Castiel has been. Oh, now you care Dean? “On a bender,” Cas says angrily. Still grumpy I see. Dean repeats that incredulously, but Sam confirms. “Yeah, he’s still pretty smashed.” Cas does his not of “import” line and wants to talk about what’s happening. Dean’s ready to listen.
Sam starts while Dean FINALLY decides to wash the blood from his hands. Leah is not a real prophet. I’m trying to figure out if that’s a cow’s head on the red leather couch Sam and Castiel are sitting on. In Minnesota? Shouldn’t it be a Loon or something like that? Anyway, so what is Leah? “The whore,” Castiel answers. A little harsh for the preacher’s daughter don’t you think? Castiel though is talking about a real being, someone who rises when Lucifer walks the earth. The Whore of Babylon. Oh, that makes sense. Especially since she comes bearing false prophecy. That bitch, I mean whore. She has the power to take form of a human, read minds, all that jazz.
Leah was likely killed months ago. The demons in the town are under her control. What about the Enochian exorcism? Good thing you’ve got the angel to translate! “It actually means you breed with the mouth of a goat.” Castiel laughs, Sam and Dean give him blank stares. “It’s funnier in Enochian.” So the demons smoking is a con, just so innocent blood can be spilled in God’s name. I’m taking that’s a bit FU to the man upstairs. Who’s not upstairs.
Her goal is to condemn as many souls to Hell as possible. “She’s well on her way to dragging this whole town into the pit,” Castiel says. I liked it better when he was telling Enochian jokes. Dean suddenly shows some fighting spirit. “Okay, so how do we go all ‘Pimp of Babylon’ all over this bitch?” Leave it up to Dean to always find the right thing to say. Castiel and Sam look at each other. I don’t think they got that far.
Whore, I mean Leah, is in the preacher’s office listening to Jane break down in tears while Michael Shanks sits next to her. She’s worried that she made it worse, she made the angels angry. Leah assures he she didn’t and even Pastor Gideon, who’s listening nearby, knows something is really off. She assures Jane that Paul was a sinner, would have taken them all down and she saved them. Jane is buying all this crap, but Pastor Gideon can’t hold back anymore. He asks how that can be okay. Murder is a pretty big sin. He tries to argue further and Leah pulls the faith crap. Oh, you are so going down bitch.
Castiel puts a stick on top of the Whore of Babylon book. The whore can be killed with that. It’s a stake made from a Cypress tree in Babylon. Dean’s ready to kill her and Sam takes to stick to look at its impressiveness. Ah, that young Samuel is always the curious one. Killing her won’t be that easy, Cas reveals. “The Whore can only be killed to a true servant of Heaven.” “Servant like?” Dean asks. “Not you, or me. Sam of course is an abomination.” Cue bitchface. Ha! Comedic timing is always so good on this show. They’ll have to find someone else. So naturally, next shot is on Pastor Gideon.
The flock is gathering again and now Leah is REALLY evil. The Pastor looks at her with disturbance. Leah goes on about the big plan at midnight. They knew the day would come and it’s there, the final judgment. Lots of people are smiling. They need to do this right. The angels say they aren’t ready and a few elements need to be taken care of. Sinners. Now some people don’t understand, like Jane. You’re the biggest of them all babe! Pastor Gideon tries to calm everyone down and says in a low voice she’s scaring everyone. She goes on with names but when the Pastor tries to stop her, she warns to let her go or the next sinner she names is him. I’d call that a big fat warning sign.
Yeah, the Sacrament Lutheran Militia… that alone should make everyone cringe… religious fanatics at work. They just don’t know yet what they will become, soon. How I hate it when fundamentalism does that to people. This show deals with that in a unique manner.
I loved Dean’s line whether to go screaming or buy a condo! Even after all they’ve been through he can still throw a line like that. Loved it. Also Castiel’s voicemail message ‘why do you want me to say my name?’ Priceless! I should put that on my answering machine…
Loved your fight-scene sequence! The best delivery of a knife, ever – throw it into the demon’s back, it falls forward and Dean can pull it right out and kill the other sucker. Great job, Sammy!
And drunken and kinda-already-depressed Castiel… ah, we all know where this is going… Unfortunately it’s not Monty Python… Dean’s last scene proves this again. That was heartbreaking, and it’s clear that we’re not going to have much of a breather before the end, right? Only a few more episodes to go…. Gabriel will appear again, in Trickster mode?, maybe there’ll be a few laughs, but otherwise… I’ll be dead at the end, too, Alice – wanna set up a crypt together? I’ll bring the booze.
Loved this, loved your screencaps – thanks for this, again. It may sound like a broken record, but that’s just how it is.
Cheers, Jas
Great recap as always, Alice. Loved the holy water shot out of a fire hose bit. Way back in season 1 Jensen said in an interview that he’d love to see just that on the show. Nice to see they took him up on his suggestion!
The recap for “Point of No Return” will likely be out by tomorrow. I’ve been working on that too but its WAY harder than this one. So, if you haven’t seen me around lately, it’s because I’m turning my brain to mush in recapping catch up mode!
Evil shrink from hell might provide you with some new brain, coming straight from DocBenton Incorp. Just say the word. 😆
Okay, we got booze, food, new brain tissue… what else could we possibly wish for?! Ah, I know… anyone know how to clone the Winchesters?
Forgive me, I’m just naughty today. 😉 Jas
I’d love to join you all in that crypt. I think it was the clone suggestion that cinched it. Yowza!
Alice, for some reason your recap amused me mightily. Could be because of the religious sarcasm, but you had me giggling through a lot of it. Wasn’t Jane delightful? 😯
Love that Dean could gank the Whore. Maybe Dean has lost his faith but I believe the Big Guy who matters has all the faith in the world in Dean.
Always liked Lisa and I believe that Dean has a shred of doubt that Ben is not his son. Lisa could possibly have lied about that. I read that Kripke denies that Ben is Dean’s son, but he also said there would never be angels and God on his show. If Dean has even a bit of a belief that Ben could possibly be his, is it any wonder that he would want to protect him and his mom? I love him even more for that.
I would like to think that after this show comes to an end I could imagine Dean and Lisa and Ben happily together for ever after. With Sammy and Sara next door of course! They both so deserve it.
Even so, I NEVER want him to say yes to Michael! 🙁 😉
Great recap Alice. Loved the screencaps for the fight scene. Just can’t get that knife action without a video though. Never caught the 99 in the title for the 99th episode either! Whenever I hear the title though, I can’t stop thinking of that song “99 bottles of beer on the wall…..†Silly what things come to mind.
Loved the holy water fire hose, and Dean killing Leah. Good shots of the boys and the wedding too. Glad the ‘whore’ is down for the count!
Your recaps are always so much fun!
I always watch it live, but of course DVR it too to watch multiple times later, & those CW promos have gotten more & more annoying.
I noticed the shirt toss too, & wondered why that was shown. And yes, they really need some new shirts! Although if they are anything like the men in my family, they’ll only wear what they want, no matter what recommendation we ladies make or might buy them.
I adore Michael Shanks & was hoping he’d have more to do this episode. His character rocked the intro scenes, but then just sort of wilted away by the end, only doing the bidding of his shrew of a wife & the Whore & then getting pummeled by Sam. I’m hoping he got his senses back & let those poor people out of the closet.
I do often wonder what becomes of some of the poor bystanders & bewildered “innocents” the guys saved (or the family members of those they couldn’t save)who are left in limbo as the episode ends. Like Pastor Gideon, how did he deal with his daughter’s death. And do the guys tell those who have survived demon possession how not to be possessed again?
(And I still want to know how Bobby ended up getting possessed?!)
Great recap, as usual, Alice!
I like the screencap action sequence there. That was a really good way of showing it because you’re right: how do you write up an action sequence, really? Just let the action speak for itself!
I loved the holy water fire truck. Man, that thing was cool! And useful. I’d love to see Rufus driving that thing around. Man, that would be badass.
And speaking of badass, loved your idea for the CW Thursday night promotion. Some intrepid video-maker out there has to be able to do something like that, right? Please?
Ans lastly, Jas, I know how to clone the Winchesters due to my amazing alchemy skills! But you know that already. I guess this means I’m invited to the crypt, huh? Sweet! It’s going to be quite the party in there.
Hope there is room for me in The Crypt! I would not mind a visit from a cloned Bobby….or John….or..OH! Back to reality!! Just save me a place! Diane (great review by the way!)
Once again , Thank You Alice — yes we are like broken records!!
Really enjoyed this episode and your recap of it.
One of the best action sequences ever and the series of screencaps demonstrated this so well.
I too hated Jane! How dare she blame Dean for the kids death ,just what he needs a little more guilt piling on there.
I loved Drunk Cas and his ongoing battle with phones , I figure at the moment we need to cling to any funny moments like this as I have a feeling they are going to be few of these in the next couple of weeks ( heaven help us )
If there`s room in that crypt , I`ll bring chocolate! Ju
Hi Alice.
Lovely recap, funny as hell. I snorted my way through it respectively 😛
I especially like that you said Michael Shanks alot, hiya there Daniel Jackson! He looked so weird, not nerdy at all 😉 Weird. *snortysnort*
So, this is the only ep that I have watched only once. For some reason it just broke me, and I just can’t rewatch it… for a while anyways… I guess when I get my S5 DVD’s (next year prob.) then I’ll give it a go (or multiple ones) but the way I felt after this one was just… bad. They broke the boys! They broke me! Stupid Kripke *mumbles*
But truly enjoyed your recap, it was hilarious but sad, and very pretty. Thanks! 😀
A wedding with guns? In the south, those are called Saturdays. Thank you, thank you.
I wondered about the Blue Earth thing, too. One doesn’t pick the same very small town twice without a continuity shout out. Of course, why Pastor Jim didn’t have a devil’s trap sitting at the entrance to his secret stash remains a writerly mystery to this very day.
African swallow or European?
Uncle Sam, heh heh. Man, I’m sick of those damn promos, too. Enough with the coy crap, everyone just sleep with everyone and be done with it. Fucking sheesh.
As for Jane blaming Dean, given the context of rampant lunacy, it’s not all that shocking. Most folks don’t think straight on a good day, let alone when the world’s ending. Your kid gets ganked, odds are you might lose a bit of rationale.