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The others leave and past Dean knows something is up. He wants to know why he's really going. Future Dean sees no harm since Zachariah will be taking past Dean back. Past Dean knows there's something else. "You’re coming because I want you to see something. I want you to see our brother." Past Dean is confused. He thought Sam was dead. "Sam didn't die in Detroit. He said yes." Past Dean at first doesn't get it. "Yes, to what? Lucifer?" Future Dean pokes deeper, for he's more angry about it than anything. "The big yes. Lucifer's wearing him to the prom." Ha! Take that past Dean. You deserve to have that thrown back at you after taking Sam's plea for help with indifference. Luckily, he's not indifferent anymore. He's devastated, way more than when he thought Sam was dead. "Why would he do that?" a crushed past Dean asks. Future Dean has no idea, but they have no choice. It’s in him now and not getting out. They're going to have to kill him. Luckily, past Dean is still too overcome by the blow. Sammy isn’t doing so well on his own after all, is he Dean?
Now for the contrivance. "And you need to see it, the whole damned thing, how bad it gets so you can do it different." Past Dean doesn’t get what he means. Forget that, I still want to know why Sam said yes. When Zach takes past Dean back to 09, future Dean practically orders him to say yes. Past Dean is appalled. “That’s crazy. If I let him in, Michael’s going to battle the Devil. That’s going to torch half the planet.” Future Dean reminds him that’s better than no planet, which is what they have now. If he could do it over again, he’d say yes. Past Dean asks why he doesn’t now. He tried many times, but it’s too late. The angels took off and aren’t listening. It’s too late for him, but not to fix things in the past. Past Dean still holds firm, believing there’s got to be another way. “Yeah, that’s what I thought. I was cocky, never actually thought I’d lose. But I was wrong.” He again begs past Dean to say yes, and then lapses into self defeating mode, which is what usually happens when confronting yourself. “But you won’t. Because I didn’t. Because that’s not just us, is it?”
Sorry, but this is the point in the recap where breaking down all these intense Dean vs. Dean scenes becomes a mindfuck and my brain goes soft. Damn you Ben Edlund!
The crew is loading up, and Chuck the prophet, who verifies Dean is really from '09, takes some time for some parting words. " If you ever get back there, you hoard toilet paper . Understand me, you hoard it. Hoard it like it's made of gold because it is. " Dean thanks him for the warning. "You'll thank me later." Oh, it’s a crime to see Chuck reduced to this. He should be the freaking oracle or something. Ah well, opportunity lost.
Now this scene I love! I'm sorry, but the Dean/Dean scenes are dragging on a bit so I like something fresh. For one, Castiel gets to drive! Dean is in the passenger seat. So cool. Dean checks the label of the pills Cas just took and they're amphetamines. What I want to know is where does Cas get a prescription filled? They're in a war zone, right? I didn't exactly see a Walgreens anywhere (thanks Lynn for pointing that out). Castiel need s it to counter the absinthe. “Don’t get me wrong Cas, I’m happy the stick is out of your ass, but what’s going on, with the drugs, the orgies, the love guru crap.”
Cas laughs at him and reveals he's not an angel anymore. The angels left, he turned mortal, his “mojo” drained away. He’s all but useless. He broke his foot last year and was laid up for two months. Oh, I'm sure that got him laid plenty. Woman have a soft spot for men in need. Dean welcomes him to the human club. Cas says thanks, but mentions he used to belong to a much better club. “Now I’m powerless, I’m hapless, I’m hopeless, why the hell not bury myself in women and decadence? That’s what decadence is for. Why not bang a few gongs before the lights go out. But that’s just how I roll.” See Dean?? This is what happens when you think it’s a good idea to take an angel to a strip club and try to get him laid. There’s an important lesson learned.
They walk through the burned out streets of somewhere, then stake out the old abandoned Jackson County Sanitarium. The plan is to go in through the second floor window. Angry chick wonders if he’s sure about this. Future Dean assures her they’ll never see them coming, but Past Dean knows something is up. He calls future Dean to a private conference. He knows he's lying to all of them. Future Dean denies it, but past Dean has seen those lying expressions in the mirror. Yeah, you can’t fool yourself. Future Dean comes clean. They're in the middle of a hotspot and haven't seen a croat anywhere. It's obvious a trap. Cas and angry girl are decoys that will be going in the front while the two Deans surprise Lucifer in the back. Come on future Dean, you honestly think that plan is going to work? Especially since Lucifer is riding your brother who knows your every habit? I wonder at this point if he had just given up and went there to die, especially knowing that past self can change the future.
Past Dean decides to stand on moral ground. “You mean you’re going to feed your friends into a meat grinder? Cas too? You’re using their deaths as a diversion. Oh man, something is broken in you. You’re making decisions that I would never make. I wouldn’t sacrifice my friends.” Future Dean is sooo not impressed with the high horse lecture and tells past Dean no, he wouldn’t. “It’s one of the main reasons we’re in this mess actually.” Past Dean points out future Dean is betraying trust, which he totally is. “They trust me to kill the Devil and save the world. And that’s exactly what I’m gonna do.” Past Dean is ready to go all out and stop himself, so his future self knocks him out cold. Wow, that played out like a schizophrenic episode. "I tried to stop myself but lost."
Past Dean comes to just in time to see the machine guns going off upstairs. Bye bye Cas and angry girl. He rushes around the back to see a flash of white light and future Dean pinned to the ground by a foot in some fugly white pattened leather shoes. The foot twists and breaks future Dean’s neck. Yeah, he sort of had that coming. It's Sam, all dressed in white! He looks incredible! I know he's really Lucifer. Btw, I had future Dean in the death pool . Not at the 40 minute mark though. I figured he'd go five minutes later after some monologuing.
No loss though, for now we get five minutes of Lucifer/Sam monologuing with past Dean! And WOW is it wonderful! Lucifer/Sam turns around, gazes at Dean with those heavenly eyes accented by the white shirt and suit and says "Oh, hello Dean . " Then he gives him a crooked smile. Dean gets to finally trade barbs with someone who isn't himself. Sure, Jensen and Jared always have great scenes together, but with Jared as Lucifer, somehow they make it even better!
Lucifer looks Dean over. “Aren’t you a surprise?” Then he disappears in a flash of white and pops up behind Dean. He mentions Dean came a long way to see this. Dean tells him to go ahead, kill him. “Kill you?” He looks at future Dean 's corpse behind them. “Wouldn’t that be a little (beat) redundant?” Hee hee, the Devil has a sense of humor.
Lucifer goes into sympathy mode, just like the true used car salesman he is. He apologizes, for it’s got to be painful for Dean to speak to him in Sam’s form. “But it had to be your brother, it had to be.” Lucifer goes to touch him and Dean pulls away. “You don’t have to be afraid of me Dean. What do you think I’m going to do?” Oh, only destroy the world. Bad Devil!
Oh, but Lucifer isn’t done with his pitch. “Why, why would I want to destroy this stunning thing? Beautiful in a trillion different ways. The last perfect handiwork of God.” Nope, not a trace of Sam in there anywhere. Lord knows he wouldn’t say such melodramatic crap to Dean. “Ever hear the story about how I fell from grace.” Dean doesn’t want to hear a “bedtime story.” Lucifer, who’s unfazed, goes on anyway. “You know why God cast me down? Because I loved him, more than anything. And then God created -(long pause, deep breath, underhanded smile) - you. (tone changes to deep resentment). The little hairless apes.” Holy crap, Jared is killing this! How amazing!
Dean listens with his typical defiance when all villains monologue. Lucifer continues with a wicked smile. “And then he asked all of us to bow down before all of you.” His tone changes again , emoting true hurt over the situation. “To love you more than him. And I said “˜Father, I can’t. ' I said 'T hese human beings are flawed, murderous, ' and for that, God had Michael cast me into Hell. Now tell me, does the punishment fit the crime? (the puppy dog eyes of sympathy go back to malevolence) Especially when I was right.”
Man, he’s good at playing it up. “Look at what six billion of you have done to this thing. And how many of you blame me for it?” What a tricky devil. He gives Dean a sincere smile and he looks so damned heavenly. He literally has a soft glow surrounding him. Holy crap, he’s got me convinced! I think it’s the gorgeous eyes.
Lucky for all of us, Dean doesn’t fall for it. “You’re not fooling me, you know that? With this sympathy for the devil crap.” Lucifer listens now with condescendence. Dean’s eyes are glistening. “I know what you are. You’re the same thing only bigger. The same brand of cockroach I would squash in my whole life.” Lucifer tries to feign hurt, but it’s obvious it’s an act. “An ugly, evil, belly to the ground supernatural piece of crap. The only difference between them and you is the size of your ego.” Lucifer just smiles, then gives him another one of those condescending looks of pity. Man, the facial expressions! They’re all over the place and every single one of them rock!
“I like you Dean. I get what the other angels see in you.” Then he says goodbye, they’ll meet again soon. Dean, who’s pretty emotional by now, tells Lucifer he better kill him now. “You better kill me now, or I swear I will find a way to kill you. And I won’t stop.” “I know you won’t,” Lucifer says without hesitation. “I know you won’t say yes to Michael either, and I know you won’t kill Sam. Whatever you do, you will always end up here. Whatever choices you make, whatever details you alter, we will always end up”¦here.” Dean is weeping by now. “I win. So, I win.” Okay, I'm totally creeped out now. Dean tells Lucifer he’s wrong. “See you in five years Dean.” Lucifer disappears in a flash of white. Dean is left distraught and alone. He turns around, and there’s Zachariah who zaps him back. Awesome!!!!